Funtime with Mark 9:42
“Funtime” is possibly going to be a new category of articles. In this one, I cover a verse that has too many entertaining things in it to cover in my simple “fun” post, that are for those who have made a little donation. This one is available to everyone…eventually. But of course, if the spirit moves you…
This is one of the most humorous verses of Jesus’s sayings. See if you agree when I am done going over what is lost in translation.
A Dire Threat
With all its fun stuff removed, this verse is translated as a rather dire threat. Here is how Mark 9:42 is presented in Biblical translation:
KJV: And whosoever shall offend one of these little ones that believe in me, it is better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he were cast into the sea.
NIV: If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—to stumble, it would be better for them if a large millstone were hung around their neck and they were thrown into the sea.
Sounds pretty bad to me. I guess it is a little better than being tossed in a fire, but still torturous. As I explain in my series on “tossed in a fire,” Jesus meant a great deal by fire, but torture wasn’t one of them. Torture isn’t the point here.
Does the punishment fit the crime? What exactly is the crime? It is very vague here. “Offending little ones” and “causing them to stumble” means what? Exactly? We are forced to imagine that these words refer to terrible things because of the extreme punishment. However, in our current age, some children are perpetually offended by everything and everyone. I haven’t heard any sermons on this verse, but I suspect their interpretation of the crimes against children would be hair-raising. Of course, some crimes committed against children these days are pretty hair-raising, especially some of the crimes promoted by the perpetually offended.
Who Are These Children?
The "who believe in me" phrase doesn't appear in the source that I normally use, but in reviewing all the oldest Greek versions, the "in me" part appears in most of sources so I added it to my analysis.
However, this phrase means something different than today’s idea of “believe in me.” This verse is important evidence for this. You can read my detailed analysis in two articles. In the first of these articles, I discuss how these words in the Bible have changed the way we talk about “believing in” something. We would have to express this idea in different Greek words than the ones Jesus used. In the second of these articles, I explain why the Greek words probably mean “trust as much as me.” I give example why various verses make much more sense if we translate them this phrase that way.
This verse is one of those examples. Can explain why we should only protect little children if they believe in Jesus? Jesus isn’t saying that the only little ones we should not abuse are those who believe he existed. He is saying what he always says: that all children are exemplars of trust that we should emulate. They trust as much as he does. Jesus likened himself to children in exactly this way. His trust is one reason he describes himself as “the child of the man” (see this article).
What Is This Really About?
First and foremost, this verse is a great example of the exaggeration typical of Jesus's humor. Here, he uses this humor to emphasize the importance of trust and the danger destroying the trust of children. This is an important topic in every era but perhaps especially today.
In this verse, Jesus uses a number of words that he uses to lighten his sayings, making them entertain instead of threaten. The verb translated as "offend" more accurately as "cause to stumble" is one of these words. It is a "Greek" verb that is found only in the Bible. My article about it is here. It refers to putting a stumbling block before someone so that they trip. This was meant to be a humorous act, a real knee slapper in the days before late night comedy. This apparently “offended” the KJV translators, and I can’t really blame them. In English, we would simply say, "trips you up." Though it doesn't sound like it in English translation, Jesus uses this word to make light of things. It is also a word that Jesus used to describes his effect on the thinking of others (Matthew 11:6, Mark 14:27, Luke 7:23, John 16:1, etc.) This word only appears in verses that are meant to be light-hearted, and often, self-deprecating.
Another is the word translated as "cast" and "throw," which has the casual feel of our word "toss." This word is used to lighten all the “tossed in the fire” verses. Another word, left out of the KVJ and perhaps mistranslated as "large" and "heavy" in more modern versions, is perhaps the funniest. It means "of an ass,” that is, a mule. It describes both the person and the type of millstone that is weighing him down. This is a large millstone pulled around by a mule, not a person.
Here is what the people likely heard when he said this phrase:
Listeners Heard: And whoever trips up one of these little ones, these ones trusting as much as me. It is good for him especially if a millstone of an ass is positioned around that neck of his. And he had been tossed into the sea.
The "better" is not the comparative form of “good,” but the Greek word that means "good," "beautiful," and "honorable." There is an adverb meaning "especially" after "for him" that is left out of the biblical versions. Saying that something is "good for him especially" is the setup line for the punchline: the millstone of an ass around the neck, and the being tossed into the sea. This doesn’t sound especially good for anyone, but this is the point of all comedic setups: to point one way then going another.
A Mystery Ending
The end of this verse is odd. The tense of the verb meaning “trips up” is something that can happen at any point of time, but the tenses of the following verbs, "believe" (really, "trusting,") "is better" (really "is good") and "hanged/hung" (really "positioned around") are all the present tense. However, the last verb "cast/thrown" is the past perfect tense, "has been tossed." This makes it an action completed in the past. This person has been tossed into the sea before anything else happens in this verse. He was already drowning.
This is so odd, that I am tempted to translated this last clause as separate sentence.
It is good for him especially if a millstone of an ass is positioned around that neck of his. As he has been tossed into the sea.
The word “and” can be translated as “as” in a comparison. The rest of the verse works as the other part of that comparison.